First off, Carey got in trouble with me. She told both sets of parents in one day without consulting with me or offering for me to be there with the good news. She spilled her guts after dinner a few Sundays ago. I forgave her, but seriously thought about demanding reparation in the form of a sexual favor of my choosing. Her reason was that she needed support because it's a big question mark whether this one will take. It still would have been nice if she talked with me first... A week later she told me that she told her business partner too. I gave her a little bit of the bizness, but she's promised this is it unless I'm notified. From here on out.
The week after Group Death confirmed her most recent pregnancy, she got that weak, stomach pain thing where after work she just came home all bedridden craving mac and cheese. Yesterday the super sense of smell kicked in. And HARD. While she was out getting a pedicure, I made some white trash nachos. (that's canned chicken, cheese and tortilla chips) She came home and smelled the chicken and flipped. She ended up dry-heaving in the powder room about three different times. She ran out of the house and called me from the car asking me to turn on the kitchen fan and to light scented candles around the house. We needed grocery shopping done anyway. When she came home she asked me to put away the meat while she hid upstairs. I complied. No biggie.
Before dinner Carey suggested we do it...gently.
She felt bad for me because it had been awhile. I concurred. And naturally I obliged. But during the dirty deed, I noticed she kept turning her head away from mine. Like dodging kisses or something. I asked if it was my breath. Nope. Turns out my skin, in general, stunk to her. Apparently the entirety of my epidermis gave off the aroma of musk (positive!) and vanilla (negative..). A combination that repulsed her. Huh. I wasn't sure what to do about that. But she had an idea. Her solution was to keep me on top and wrap me up tight in the blankets all the way up to my neck while I gave her the slow and naughty. Basically like how they show it on TV. Pregnancy, pregnancy what joys I have yet to discover?
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